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If we only deserved an end

The history is written by those who win, but in love, it’s completely different. Stories are told by the ones who are being left; they are the ones who make movies about love, which is completely logical since art comes from pain.

The short films that were shown on the second night of Balkans Beyond Borders (BBB) Short Film Festival in Novi Sad, as a part of Memories & Emotions selection, made me question everything I thought I knew about human relationships. Although the movies came from different countries – Croatia, Greece and Norway – they captured the same feeling; the feeling of love and loss, especially the latter one.

The feeling as if you were always being watched and judged by the person with whom you were once very intimate, not only in a physical way. Even though that person isn’t present in your days anymore, you feel her in everything you do, sometimes it’s the voice in the back of your head, sometimes it’s the shadow standing beside you, but most certainly it’s someone who helped you define yourself and now you consider them as a part of your identity.

Everything you once knew, everything you were good at, is now related to that one person, so what should one do? Should he learn to live with it or should he find something new? These are the questions to which the movie Duo? Indentity tried to answer, but unfortunately, didn’t succeed in, on purpose. Because sometimes it’s better not to know the answer.

Love is like boarding a boat to the end of the world.

After a certain period of time, you only remember the fragments… You’re not sure what your motives were, what made you stay and does it even count now that it’s over; when it comes to an end, us humans tend to forget everything we learned, in favour of healing ourselves. We deceive ourselves that, if it was any good, it would last, it would never end. And if you question yourself about wasting your time, you probably did waste it, because you don’t know how to value everything you gave in and got in return. If you only wish to forget everything that happened and move on, you probably don’t even deserve an end.

Pascha

Those words are now inked in my memory by the movie Pascha, which is about two lovers who boarded a boat to the end of the world. I want to believe that the boat is the metaphor for their love, and I could only imagine how he felt when his girlfriend told him, in the middle of an ocean, that she wanted to leave and get to the safe ground.

impulse

Another film that continues to unravel this feeling is Impulse, as in „a sudden strong and unreflective urge or desire to act.“ The protagonist is a girl who’s trying to do her daily routine, go to work, deal with people, save her reputation, while spending a lot of time alone, ignoring her thoughts. Because, if you ignore them long enough, they’ll go away, right?

She’s seeing other people, as a part of the famous „moving on“ thing, and she says that She can hear Him calling, but the sense is irrelevant. He is the one who isn’t there. He is not the one kissing her neck right now, so why is she hearing his voice? However, she is certain that, one of these days, the voice will go away, if she continues to ignore it and keeps repeating the same routine she always does. Because, other people don’t care about what she feels, she has to keep going to work, pretending as if nothing happened, because the whole world doesn’t stop if your own world crushes at one moment. The traffic lights will still go from red to yellow and green. Apparently nobody cares, so you shouldn’t as well. And it will pass, as everything passes. In the meantime, you can only comfort yourself the same way the protagnist in this movie does – You can’t miss someone forever.

Marija Stojadinović, Student at Media department of Faculty of philosophy, Novi Sad